Everyday Systems: nosdiet: message 954 of 3212

Note: This is an archived message from our old discussion software. Join the current discussion here.

    
Hi Diane,

Welcome and thanks for this long and thoughtful post!
While I can't comment on your "one S at a time"
proposal from experience, it does make a lot of sense,
and there is honorable precedent in the literature of
self improvement. Here's the story, for those who are
unfamiliar with it:

Ben Franklin decided that there were 13 virtues that
he wanted to acquire.

http://dan.hersam.com/philosophy/franklin_virtues.html

Being the practical fellow that he was, he decided he
would: 

1) not just name them, but come up with a memorable
quote for each to make it clear what he was talking
about. For example, people understand very different
things under the term "temperance." 

2) keep a ledger to record any infractions against
these virtues.

3) (here's the relevant part) concentrate on only a
single virtue at a time, on the assumption that it is
impossible to consciously focus on more than one at a
time, and that the habits built during one period of
sustained concentration will carry over at least to a
degree into the next.

If you do try the one S at a time approach, be sure to
let us know how it goes. You'll be a no-s pioneer.
Though I hesitate to advise things I haven't tried
myself, I can't see how one S at a time would hurt
(unless you think impatience at even slower progress
might slip you up). Though they do complement one
another, each S restriction is a good in itself. Doing
just one is better than doing none and might get you
in better shape willpower and habit wise for the next.
What you might want to do is try strict no-s for a
week just to observe, as a diagnostic, half assuming
you'll fail. Maybe you'll find it's easier than you
thought, in which case you're golden. If not, ask
yourself, can I do this for real next week? Or should
I try just one S strictly and take it from there?

Looking forward to hearing more from you,

Reinhard

--- Diane Sheats <Diane_Design@...> wrote:
> Hi everyone - (I have a habit of rambling
> so this is long,
> sorry!)
> 
> I am new but I won't take time to tell my (typical
> long sad) story at the
> moment. =) I am impressed by the brilliant
> simplicity of Reinhard's No S
> plan, and I agree wholeheartedly that it should
> address most of the main
> problems. I long ago concluded that there is no
> point in "going on a diet"
> that I will later "go off of," and that a permanent
> change of habits is my
> (our) only hope. Therefore, for years I have
> steadfastly refused to try to
> change any habit if I couldn't face committing for
> the rest of my life. As
> a lifetime dieter, I am sick and tired of setting
> myself up for "failure"
> and I don't have the motivation to set goals any
> more. The only thing I am
> willing to do is concentrate on changing ONE
> habit...one habit at a time.
> 
> About 10 years ago I lost about 30-35 pounds (over
> the course of a year) and
> maintained a really good weight for three years, by
> following this
> principle. I really thought I had this thing licked
> once and for all. I
> thought I had discovered the secret. Then I got a
> bit too careless, and
> because I had thrown off "the tyranny of the scale"
> and never weighed myself
> any more, I didn't realize I had started to regain
> until I was up about
> 15-20 pounds. (Another mistake: *always* wearing
> loose comfy clothes.)
> Since I had stopped "seeing myself as fat" when I
> looked in the mirror, I
> didn't even see the fat when it started coming back!
> It's good to accept
> ourselves the way we are, but maybe we can't take
> the acceptance *quite* so
> far. =)
> 
> Anyway, here I am, up now about 45 pounds from my
> comfortable low weight. I
> got here gradually, but became really alarmed after
> the final 20 pounds
> seemed to show up very suddenly--though I guess it
> probably took about a
> year. I don't think I can blame myself entirely,
> because my eating habits
> are not much different from when I was maintaining. 
> I have decided that age
> and changing metabolism has been part of the problem
> (I'm 38 now), a change
> in exercise levels is another big part (I have now
> begun an exercise program
> that I can live with), and I also suspect that sleep
> deprivation and stress
> has played a hitherto unsuspected role in both
> gaining and difficulty
> losing. I have been reading about this lately but
> it's not one you hear
> about. In my previous successful weight loss, I did
> leave behind most of my
> worst habits--snacking after dinner, overeating, and
> stress eating. But
> there are still behavioral issues remaining: boredom
> snacking, eating when
> not hungry, and sweets, to be specific.
> 
> Now here's my question... Has anyone here ever
> tried taking the S's one at
> a time? I find that psychologically, it's very hard
> for me to face more
> than one habit change at a time. I already don't
> overeat--I never take
> seconds. Thank God, I haven't felt that overstuffed
> feeling for years. But
> when I try to think about no snacks AND no sweets, I
> get that frantic "don't
> put me in jail" feeling that always accompanies a
> "diet." I don't eat a lot
> of sweets any more, just a piece of chocolate or two
> after a meal if I want
> it, or a small something with my coffee, or a few
> bites of dessert after
> dinner (never anything big; I just can't do that any
> more). I think maybe I
> should start with NO SNACKS WHATSOEVER for three
> weeks, and then think about
> the sweets later.
> 
> Feel free to laugh if you find this funny! =)
> ...but I am seriously
> wondering if anyone else has done this or if I'm
> just fooling myself to
> think I can take the gradual approach. Or maybe the
> gradual approach would
> work with some of us, but not all. It's just really
> hard when I know I
> successfully lost and maintained before without
> totally giving up sugar. I
> feel like a whining child saying "It's just not
> fair!" but really, it's so
> annoying that I'm eating very much as I did when I
> lost before, but now my
> body has changed and I can't get away with it!
> 
> I see all over again when I re-read this that it's
> *all in our minds,* isn't
> it? That's why diets don't work. As another
> no-diet guru says, diets are
> all about making the food behave, but that doesn't
> address the root problem.
> 
> Well, I won't take more time to philosophize
> now...but you'll probably hear
> me later!
> 
> Thanks and good luck to all of you!
> Diane
> 
> 
> [Non-text portions of this message have been
> removed]
> 
> 
> 
> 

> --------------------~--> 
>
>

>
--------------------------------------------------------------------~->
> 
> 
> 
>
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
>