Everyday Systems: nosdiet: message 1340 of 3212

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--- In , navin@i... wrote:
> Well, I've been No-S-ing for about 9 months, and have lost about 15
> lbs. One of the biggest difficulties I have been running into 
is
> dealing with food at the office. Often people bring in stuff just 

for
> the heck of it - it's usually not difficult to turn that down. But
> frequently - maybe once every couple weeks - people bring in sweets
> that are homemade, or bring in celebratory food for things such as
> promotions, birthday, etc. From a social standpoint, it can be
> difficult to turn that kind of stuff down (especially the homemade
> stuff), not to mention the regular temptations of having something
> nice and tasty across the hall.
> 
> Anyone else have this kind of issue? Any good ways of dealing with
> it? Granted, I suppose if I'm still losing weight, it must not be
> *that* big of a problem, but this is still an issue... I definitley
> see consequences on the scale when this happens.
Hi Navin :)
This is just one of those things that, like vending machines in the 
lunch room, can totally foil your success...If you choose to have 
those sweets every once in a while then well I guess it's no huge 
thing...But the way you are describing it, this sounds more like a 
pattern you don't really wish to fall into.
I believe, like saying no to a cigarette or a drink for people with 
chronic weight issues (us!)
No one in your office will feel offended if you simply say
"wow it looks great and I'm sure it's delicious, but I have decided 

to eliminate sweets from my regular days of the week"
I guess if it was your birthday and everyone went out of their way to 
give you a special treat, it would be a bit different.
If they are offended or keep pushing it and tempting you, all I can 
think of is that Monty Python voice saying
"Run away!"
Not to get paranoid, but there are some people who feel threatened 
when they hear that their friend, spouse or coworker is trying to 
diet and then, in the guise of a friendly offer, will try to give 
unwelcome "treats" This happened to me a few weeks ago with a close 

friend of mine..I had just told her how miserable I was at this high 
weight (ps is is a lot less after only a week, 7 pounds off!)
and we were at a concert at the park. During the intermission I 
accompanied her to the snack bar, because she was in need of ice 
cream. I heard a little voice in my head saying "why are you joining 

her at the snack bar, why don't you wait till she gets back to talk, 
you don't really need to look at all those snacks and torture 
yourself", but I walked with her anyway.
She was also, complaining that she was gaining some weight back these 
days and had no self control...When we got over there, I was pretty 
uncomfortable when she offered to buy me something too. I left my 
cash at home on purpose, because I didn't want to have any icecream 
and figured that it would keep me from making a bad choice that night.
It seemed innocuous enough at the time, but I really believe 
somewhere inside of her, unconsciously, she was just trying to get 
someone to "cheat" with her...After all, I did tell her that I was 

really sad about my gaining weight, why then would she even offer it 
to me?
I truly believe they mean no harm consciously, but maybe your success 
and strength somehow represents that they are the opposite
You know the saying "misery loves company" well unfortunately some 

people function best around people when they are all in a big 
miserable "boat" together. 
Hope that is not the case, but don't completely dismiss the 
possibility. The way to find out if people will support your new 
life plan, is just to come out and say "No thanks" and if people keep 

pushing stuff on you, you will know who respects what you are doing 
to better your health. I actually sent her an email that night 
asking to not offer me any fattening "treats" in the future because 

it is really hard to say no and I am very serious about changing my 
life...She wrote me back and understood completely, respected my 
stated feelings, and wished me luck...A true friend : )
15 lbs is a great achievement! More so is the fact that you have 
stuck it out long enough in the patience department, and you are 
probably not going to give up since you made it this far!
You Rock :)
Hope these suggestions will help
Love and Peace,
Debbie.